EDITORS NOTE: Over the next week Ro-ESPN will be documenting the crisis in the Roblox Hockey League (RHL). The following is based on true events and information gathered by Ro-ESPN investigators. In addition this article contains graphic information (such as violence) and viewer discretion is advised.
COLUMBUS--The RHL is the largest communist organization in the world. At the top of it sits a soulful, ripped, and chick-magnet dictator named Commissioner Bens. While he may look like someone your girl may cheat on, he has oppressed the people of the RHL.
Today several bombings went off at an RHL protest led by Gh0strecon49, famous for having the quadruple crown of ass: assbergers, acting like an ass, having a tight ass, and having a jack ass for a pet. The protesters were protesting Ben's oppression towards those like Gh0strecon49, whose internet-tough guy persona intimidated RHL officials into suspending him.
"They just fired into our peaceful protest," said Gh0st, "Allah will see to it that they burn in hell."
The protest contained members of the Allahban, who believe in crying until you get your way. The RHL proceeded to convince their citizens into believing that a bus full of toddlers had exploded (which is also a very common occurence as just last week a kid by the name of Hashbrowns19 had died in an explosion).
"Wait, there was a protest going on?" asked Tinyberry3, "I thought that a bunch of kids had just pooped themselves."
When asked about the incident, RHL officials denied having any involvement.
"Why would we shoot a group of protestors?" asked co-commissioner Deathrange07, "We make sure that they were given a totally fair and unbiased trial before doing that."
Many RHLers have complained of blind officials, biased laws being passed, and an unfair gap between the rich and the poor.
"We are so much better," said AAAWIP Jong Ung, head of the ROBLOX Northkorea Hockey League, "atleast we try to look like an average league."
Among the supporters of the Allahban are Sombervilla123, Habs100, Poipoi,and TheKinglyOne.
"I believe in rule by the people," said Habs, "Gh0st is a great person"
The Allahban have recently become more violent in their crying however.
"Jus-Just last week was the last time I saw him," said Tinyberry3 with tears running down his face, who lost FIRECAKE in a violent car bomb last week in a surprise attack by the Allahban, "I am lost without him, I need him inside of me."
Part 2 of 7 tomorrow.
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